Good morning.
Following on from my last post, I would like to address the issue of being 'tough' or 'hard.' On the face of it - there is not much to debate, but I am sure that it is far more than being the best fighter or street brawler. In fact, it is a sad reflection on humanity (and in particuar men) that it is far easier to resort to physical force to 'prove' an argument than it is to use diplomacy and rhetorical skills - especially if one side feels insulted by the other's words or conduct. Exacerbated by alcohol, this is all too prevelant in the pub culture of today. (An interesting aside - it was been noted by eminent historians that the reason that the UK was not subject to revolutions at the time when the rest of Europe was unstable eg around the time of the French Revolution, was because Parliament allowed dissatisfaction to be aired in a public area with ensuing debate. This still continues to be the situation today - if people are not happy they are able to make a complaint to their local MP who will raise it in Parliament on their behalf).
That being the case, the saying 'to be kind to your enemy is to be cruel to yourself' is certainly true. Unfortunately there are times in life when the use of force is unavoidable. But - the use of awareness, intelligence, diplomacy and verbal skills - not to mention common sense - should minimalise these occasions to make them rare. I have met far too many people (and not a few martial arts instructors) who believe that 'aggression is the best solution.' I'm afraid i don't subscribe to this view. There are situations when it is necessary, but it should always be used intelligently (and sparingly) and not as some kind of 'universal solution' or philosphy for life. Giving out aggression is not only degenerating the human race, but what kind of response is like to ensue? It certainly won't be an intelligent discussion about the best way to solve a problem.
As I mentioned previously, standing up for what you believe is far more impressive than hitting out whenever you are offended - even if you are able to hit someone in an 'elegant' martial arts way! Physical toughness is simply not that impressive - just a result of training and conditioning. Mental toughness, on the other hand, while still a result of this is also far more. It requires you to look inside yourself and face your demons. A person must find out and challenge their insecurities and fears. To first understand and then overcome these is certainly no small feat, especially as there is no universal solution for success. Wing Tsun offers you principles to help you find the way, but you must do the hard work.
I believe someone is 'tough' who can keep their culture and values when others are set on changing them, or when a person can keep their morals despite continued temptations. A person is also 'tough' who can work for the good of other people and not just for him or herself. No time is this more true than today in the era of commercial and capitalist society. It is just too easy to opt for the 'quick' money rather than than earning less but responsibily (and I'm unhappy to say this is also prevelant in the martial arts). It is certainly 'tough' to attempt to engender a positive change in society in addition to a positive change in yourself.
Finally I think a person is 'tough' who is able to keep going despite the challenges. There are always people in life who will criticise what another is doing - but to keep going despite the negatives comments, doubts and hardship - that person is the 'toughest' of them all.
Sifu